I'll try my best to put my mind into words.
My quote: The strong eats the weak.
I wonder why I'm not eaten. Precisely because this world is nothing like that anymore.
I can't be strong in this world, not ever.
I can't be violent, I'm scared, I can't fight back. I'll be mashed into honey baked pie. because I'm born like that.
In fact, it's common sense.
That's why I hate the world. I hate the freaking world. That's why I want to destroy it. That's why I want to commit seppuku, ritual suicide in Japan. That's why I have a Seppuku scar on my chest.
I have my pride. If I'm weak, why the hell would I bother living? Why the hell would I live like this? Why the hell would I embrace this kind of crap, romance, love, affection? Please don't talk me out of it, cus I'm never that kind of person. I think its full of ****ing sh*t. Really. You get WEAK cus of that. It never gets fun.
I can never embrace violence like this, I cannot protect myself like this, I can't even do any strong crap like opening a stupid ****ing can. I'm weak like this, I'm weak in the world, I'm weak everywhere. I want to be killed, not by the strong for it is my pride to not face utter humiliation like this. I know you think I'm muttering crap, but yeah, this is my mind, you have your own mind so you read your own crap.
If people around me pretend, pretend to sucuumb to my attacks, that I tried so hard, I will never gain anything. They are still more powerful at the end, they will still outpunch me, when they feel like doing it. I will never outpunch them, even if I tried harder and harder, because nature makes me like that, because I am like that, because I... I just am like that
I feel ****ing limited, I feel like killing myself, going out to space and just abandoning everything there, I feel like dying, I don't want to be born like that, all small, like a helpless insect about to be smashed by an elephant.
Why am I not killed? Why am I not eaten? I feel like I could just jump from the cliffs at any moment now, if I'm over there.
People label me as weak, why don't they just eat me? Turn me into mashed potato or clean white bones? Why don't they just be T-Rexes? Why don't they EAT THEIR OWN HEART!?!?
