The thief was an idiot, always getting caught by the police. But he still didn't stop thieving.
One day he had enough and decided to go to a bandit school. He tried to find one in his Starhub mobile TV. After 1.5693 hours of searching, he found it!
In it was written:
"School for thieves who know nothing about ABC
Call: 5005IAMANIDIOT.org"
So he tried to call the number but can't find the letters. He then knew he was cheated and was very sad. He tried to jump down from the building but to no avail cus he chose a wooden cottage for his suicide. He felt so stupid, there was no more meaning to his life since he was stupid.
Then he realised that, since he knew that he was stupid, he must be clever. After all, nobody stupid would know that they are stupid right? And so he moved on to his life.
He then went to a kindergarden school, and learnt to write and draw. He learnt his ABCs and 123s.
After 2 years he went to primary school. Then he procceeded to secondary school.
He fell in love with a girl at the streets, that was selling flowers, guns and knives. It was then he realised she had a mole on her cheek and he SCREAMMMMEDEEDDDD!!!! and suffocated and went to a coma.
He was then carried to a hospital and treated for liver transplant. o.o
And then he was told that he can never steal again. He was sad..........
And he decided to kill himself again. So he went to candyland and decided to jump into a chocolate river. But the chocolate river was too tasty he couldn't resist drinking the water!!! Till it was no more, he was as fat as beef and that the whole river disappeared, and he can't kill himself. He cried for months and months and a new river appeared again. He drowned in it...
And landed in Heaven.
The thief then saw how pretty the angels were and decided to be a cannibal instead. He cooked and ate them. God saw this horrible scene and banished him to hell.
At first the demons tortured him. Well, demons that look like red pigs.
but then he was promoted to becoming commander of demons.
He lived happily ever after in hell after that.
The end.
Labels: storiesa
